A lot of you might know the situation. You’re bored, you’re not feeling too well mentally and you’re left alone with your thoughts, pondering, chewing over every single thing that flows through that mind of yours. Well, there are different ways to deal with these kind of moments but before we head to those methods let’s first explain the situation a bit.
First of all, life isn’t a straight line, it has ups and downs. You cannot simply have ups or downs all the time, even in a general good time of your life with lots of ups, you might still have some downs but due to the many ups, they have less impact or are less severe. This is why people with depressions often feel as if they never are happy. They do have ups, but they’re either so few in numbers or simply done have enough impact to make any significance in the emotional experience of the person.
Okay, so we have ups and downs, and we can’t simply count periods as all ups or downs. So one could become very rational and make happiness into a mathematical equation.
Happiness(t) = wx(t) –vy(t)
W = number of good experiences.
x = general impact of good experiences
v = number of bad experiences
y = general impact of bad experiences
t = time
There even was a philosopher, Bentham, who thought happiness could be measured and that humans live for their pursuit of happiness, equating everything happening in their life to this pursuit.
Too bad, it doesn’t work like this either because our mind might be slightly rational, our feelings aren’t and sometimes we can get hit in the gut by a bad feeling coming out of nowhere. Those cheap shots are triggered by unconscious thoughts unsettling you because they have a bad connotation somewhere in your mental health.
‘So why the whole introduction into this thinking?’ you might be thinking. In these types of moments, what you’d best do is first realize that this is just a temporal setback, it’s not permanent. Yes you might be feeling a bit down for a moment but it always goes back up! First of try controlling your thoughts, don’t let them spiral into the abyss of negativity. Second of all, less thinking, more feeling! Once you stop letting your thoughts influence your feeling, you’ll calm down. Breath in two seconds through your nose, breath out four seconds through your mouth. Feel the air captivate you, fill your entire body. Shut down your thinking and reside in your feeling, the touch of your skin with the floor, the air softly breezing through your hair. Feels good doesn’t it? Don’t go panicking and go in break-down mode. It’s not bad to have these moments, they remind you that you’re alive, that you’re in need of grounding, of going back to your feeling, from time to time. They can be seen as checkpoints, to stand still for a moment and assess our lives. It only becomes a problem if you keep standing still and let yourself be shut down by anxiety and fear.
Mindfulness is regarded as a mental technique but should more be seen as a way of living and thinking.
If you often feel these kinds of stress moments, these anxiety attacks, I’d advise you to check it out!
After thinking night after night for over ten years, these are thought structures I have set up about my perception of the world. It’s very constructive and is structured upon the idea that there is no such thing as truth or false, right or wrong, only perception and that our perception creates the world as we perceive it.