Complicated

I know a bunch of you have been wondering what is going on with me. I haven’t been streaming as much and it has been pretty difficult to keep up with my new TBA schedule. Time to pull back the curtain so you can know what has been going on.

My back has been terrible. I’ve been travelling for charity and it is taking a toll on me physically and mentally. I went on a trip to Vegas to get to talk about Operation Supply Drop and #HealthyGamer with the folks from Gamestop. It was a great time that I spent making new friends and hopefully inspiring a few folks to take on my burpee challenge. I have been returning home to do a few hours at the gym a day and spent the rest of the hours in bed trying to rest. Having Lilly more often has made my free time that much more important and it sucks when she is here and I am unable to do as much with her as I’d like because of back pain.

Oh did I mention my girlfriends mother is now living with us? Imagine a lady who doesn’t speak english, doesn’t understand parenting, and who wants to feed you soup when it is 100 degrees outside. Yeah. I dream of being back in Iraq in the Fallujah area and it seems nice somehow.

I’ve been struggling in pretty much every section of my life. Physical, mental, and even emotional. When I try to refocus on what matters it seems that certain things get blurry. I focus on the kids and my health then suddenly streaming and being online gets fuzzy. At a time like now I am working on figuring it all out.

So thanks for being here while my life falls apart. While I’m making hotline calls because I’m feeling lost and alone. Like the weight of the world is going to crush me someday. I hope to be back to a more normal (well for me anyways) here in the next few weeks but we’ll see.

I love you Healthy Gamers. You and the veterans lives I change through Operation Supply Drop make it all worth it.

<3